Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
