I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Randomize