North Korea, Best Korea!
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
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