that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
Randomize
