This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
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