I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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