i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
