sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
Randomize
