I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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