Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
