Need sex. Gaining weight.
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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