He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
23 Fathers Confess The Best Way They’ve Messed With Their Daughter’s Boyfriend
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
25 Children of Helicopter Parents Admit The Most Horrible Thing They Were Put Through
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold