so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize
