i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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