U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
