I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
