I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
you made out with another girl for some wings
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