When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
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