We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
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