Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
Randomize
