She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Randomize