Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
Randomize
