i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
My vagina is very pro this idea
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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