a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Randomize
