we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize
