Will you blow on my dice?
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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