Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
