the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Randomize
