hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
