alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
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