Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
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