his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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