Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Randomize