it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Randomize
