Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
And then my night got REAL pukey
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Randomize
