Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Randomize
