Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
vagina is talking i cant
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
Randomize
