I wannas sexs uuuuu
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Randomize
