i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
