we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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