she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
I just found a bag of teeth...
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
Randomize
