Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
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