I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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