I hope mine doesn't look like that
i may or may not be watching the land before time
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Randomize