Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Randomize
