Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
