Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
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