I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
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