how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
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