Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
being pregnant is like rehab
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
Randomize
